Five types of people you don’t want to encounter

Art by Ross Du

Hey Ma, not every wrong thing in this age is caused by millennials and Gen X babies. Just because we’re always on our phones and in front of the kompyuter doesn’t mean we don’t know how to be decent human beings IRL. Each generation has its own pool of people we don’t really like. (I mean, look at our current administration.) So beyond viral Facebook posts and Twitter threads, here are types of crappy people we’ve all encountered.

The rude Uber poolmate

Stories about rude drivers go viral all the time but rarely do stories about rude passengers ever get told. These people who purposely take all the space at the back, litter nonchalantly, and worst of all, talk to drivers condescendingly are the worst. Yes, you paid for the service, but no one — not even your co-passenger — signed up for this kind of disrespect. BRB, finding you an online course about GMRC.

How to deal with them: Ask the driver if you can move to the front or you can give the passenger the death stare. Either way, I’m sure it’ll send a clear message. Makuha sila sa tingin.

The Instagram-obsessed concertgoer

We get it, you want to remember this moment. We all do too. But how can we even watch what’s on stage if you’re blocking our view with your phones the entire time? Did you enjoy dancing to that song while you were taking blurry shots of the artists? Did you get it on record when I “accidentally” hit your arm? Let us, the people behind you, enjoy the show we all equally paid for. Or else there’s going to be more obnoxious dancing and screaming behind you.

How to deal with them: Tap their shoulders, point at their phones, and shout, “I can’t see anything.” If that doesn’t work, go in front of them and say, “I think it’s better this way.”

The educated troll

They’re the educated fanatics who still share fake news from fake websites. They went to the same school as you did and even learned from the same professors. These keyboard warriors are the type of people who’ll start their argument with “ito na yung mga nagawa ni Tatay Digong” and will end their argument with “Ah basta, #Du30 pa rin ✊.” once you give them facts.

How to deal with them: Leave a short but sweet message for all their friends to see: “Isn’t this fake news? ☹️”

The cellphone snoops

You could borrow my phone for your selfies, and even stalk your ex with it. But this permission doesn’t mean it’s okay for you to read my messages. More importantly, you can’t check whatever’s in my camera roll too. It’s kind of off-putting that you’ll even have the gall to tease me about whatever you saw on my phone. (And no, just because I don’t want to show you doesn’t mean that I have n00dz~) Quit the habit before your friends quit on you.

How to deal with them: Be a true friend by calling them out on this. Explain why it’s wrong and then offer to edit their selfies nicely as their consolation.

The friend who can’t keep their spoilers

Congrats, you’re able to watch Game of Thrones ahead of everyone. You get too excited about it that you “unintentionally” release spoilers of it. Yes, it might only be about Jon Snow’s beautiful ass but now we’ve read your tweet, we are left impatiently expecting to see Kit Harrington’s butt as soon as the opening credits roll. No thanks to you, of course. Spoiler alert! If you keep doing this, you’ll keep on losing friends.

How to deal with them: Thank the tech gods for the mute button. It exists for a reason. Hear from you never, binch.

#friendship #self

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